Then as I started my journey in writing about my grief I found this poem I wrote right around the time I was most depressed and pregnant with my child that later died.
(Written -Sept 30 2011)
The attention I need is lacking
The love I crave is invisible
Simple words are ignored
Loneliness is vast.
The attention I desire goes un-answered
My love for you turns bitter
I can’t explain, how it’s not enough, to just love
Emptiness grows, as words are forgotten.
The attention I want, ignored
Our love, bickered to death
So simple, is the answer, yet so hard to speak?
Everything that once was gold is now ash.
My eyes are now sullen
My heart has sunk
The world is unforgiving, with every thought de-bunked
Hope fades, the path is clear, but wanting what was never does steer.
Life has unanswered questions
Paths that lead us are unclear
Love is not always easy or forgiving
No attempt is a life left with regret